I recently decided it was time to make some changes to the way I work — the way I have been working since the last 7–8 years. I felt that if I didn’t, soon one day I might be left with only the crumbs from this delicious pie of life — that I would be filled with regret about why I did not savor every bite of it while I still could.
I’ve been a professional artist for over a decade now. The journey till here has seen a lot of phases — like any relationship ; ) It’s been exciting like a new romance — butterflies in my stomach every time I had an idea for a new piece and thought it was like no other. ever. Then the next phase signified by becoming comfortable — maybe too comfortable — with emotional and financial stability, responsibilities & set routines like most marriages. And after a period of time the next phase which was where I was struggling to keep it exciting enough to have my mind engaged. We had to make it work no matter what though because, unlike a relationship, there was no sliver of possibility when it came to a separation between art & I as a couple, because being an artist is who I am. It’s who I’ve been ever since I remember being able to hold & use a crayon. And since the day I drew an ice cream stall in one small corner of a paper sheet at a local art competition — and when asked why I didnt use the rest of the paper — replied saying that since the ice cream stall was very popular, the rest of the paper is basically full of huge crowds of customers are gathered outside. The stall was so colorful and detailed that I still got a runner-up prize. This drawing was also fitting because I used a to be a shy quiet child who would often be found drawing either in a corner of the room or under the backmost benches in my school classroom; which at times I was thrown out of class for because the teacher would be upset to see me taking no interest at all in her history lesson!
Taking a step into the art business, started as a fun project. And it was. And it was also making me more money than I ever imagined. For many years. Then in the past few years however without realizing — especially post Covid — the race to produce more, create more trending pieces, market more, post more started sucking the fun out of the whole endeavor. Interestingly, someone close to me used to ask me one question every single year — “Is it still Fun, Uma?”. At the time, I would not give it much thought and just answer “Yeah.” but it was becoming more of a lie than the truth day by day. The madness of keeping up a specific production volume and feeling like nothing was enough — had basically turned my life into a 9 to 6 job which was not what I had signed up for.
So, I decided to change that and start making room for anything & everything that I want to/wish to do. This currently includes a wide range of things like travel, reading, writing, creating just for my own pleasure, experimenting with new styles and forms, thinking, reviving some lost connections from the past that I valued but simply had not put any effort into nurturing over the years. I also wanted to set very clear boundaries now and say no as an when needed to protect my sanity and peace of mind. Also, letting things & people be while having them too let me be. Being myself was at the top of the list.
Even the thought of making these changes had an immediate positive impact on the way my mind worked. It immediately felt relaxed and yet excited to turn a new leaf and see what the next chapter brings. One of the things that this chapter might bring is experimenting with sustainable options — like turning textile waste into art. I also look forward to a collaboration that can connect art to philanthropy.
I’m going to call this chapter either “Renewing Our Vows” or “It’s Fun Again.”